All hail the new season of Pokémon

Or, “please fetch me a rusty fork so that I may gouge out my eyes, okay, thanks.”

I make no bones about my dislike of Pokémon. (In fact… I’ve talked about it before.) I just don’t understand its popularity. Cool creatures with special powers? Very enticing. Many different attributes to remember and factoids to consider? Very educational. A stilted cartoon with whiny voices and less-than-stellar animation? Please make it stop.

Because I do believe it to be educational (in spite of being behind a show that makes me want to stomp on my own eyeballs), I permit my son to partake in the Kool-Aid that is Pokémon. But I may just try to keep this news from him:

The tale of Ash Ketchum, Pikachu and their friends continues as they face some of their biggest adventures yet in the brand new ninth season of the popular Pokémon series. Pokémon: Battle Frontier will air exclusively on Cartoon Network, part of Cartoon Networkââ¬â¢s Saturday morning line-up of comedic and action-adventure programming. The new season kicks off on Saturday, Sept. 9, at 9 a.m. (ET, PT) with a special one-hour episode. The series will air regularly on Saturday mornings at 9:30 a.m. (ET, PT).

Pokémon: Battle Frontier takes Ash and Pikachu back to the Kanto region to complete the Battle Frontier, seven ultimate tests that will challenge Ashââ¬â¢s skills as a Pokémon Trainer. Ashââ¬â¢s friend May must also face some stiff competition as she seeks to win Kantoââ¬â¢s Pokémon Contests and become a top Pokémon Coordinator. Together, these two Trainers and their friends will recruit more Pokémon, battle powerful opponents, and make new friends, all in this climactic ninth season of Pokémon.

It’s the climactic ninth season. Doubtless something totally different will be happening this year, even more exciting and gripping than ever before! (My money is on Brock actually opening his eyes, but that’s just a guess. And I don’t want to spoil it for you.)

I’m sorry; I know that Pokémon has a loyal following and all. But this is still on television (for the ninth year), yet Teen Titans was cancelled? I think I need to go lie down.